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It squishes, it pinches,
It mooshes, it pooshes,

It twiddles, it twaddles,

It cuts, it slices,
It dices, it mices,

It toasts, it boasts,
It converts, it saves,

It shines, it dines,
It dips, it flips

And don't forget, it cures heartburn!

...and if you order today, at no cost to you, you'll receive a cleaning shammie! Not one but two!

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